Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Alexander's LiveJournal:

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Wednesday, August 14th, 2002
2:00 pm	Hmmm, I miss my tiggress so much.. Lost my friend Moonchild earlier, but well.. Its his choice and not mine... I don't force people to be my friends or demand them to.. They don't wanna be friends.. FINe with me.. I have my love, my mate, my friends and my Diving.. I don't need more than that.. I MISS my tiggs, every hour without her is hurting.. She is worried that I might not like her.. I mean.. My godess, I love her way too much to stop loving her.. She is her own person with her own quirks :) *kissies her* and I love her for who she is.. :) A perfect, wonderful caring and beautiful mate with the biggest heart I have seen in someone except Elyssa the Bloodqitty.. :) Oh I almost forgot, this is who I am in the elements.. I am going to see my tigress soon ;) YAY... WHEEE (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, August 10th, 2002
9:14 pm	There is few feelings I have.. but this is one of them.. and now my heart is aching, once again.. Why? Well, a lot of things.. Current Mood: sad Current Music: Filmmusik - Gladiator (Comment on this)
9:12 pm	Some blasted people.. They should learn this and that.. Anyone who dares to think "I" would hurt my loved one can bite my flukes to hell.. Sheez, Some people.. the nerve they have.. I can get the point they are worried but what the god damn hell.. if the person choose not to believe me the person can literally go to hell.. and YES fur-wolf that is aimed towards you.. I appreciate your concern for tiggs, but I know myself and SHE knows myself and moreover Elyssa knows me and she is on the watch so that my heart doesn't get broken because she knows what would happen.. which YOU fur-wolf don't even know a THING about.. You know NOTHING about me except the parts I have allowed you to know about.. tiggs, elyssa, mantle, Dolphy and several others though.. they KNOW me, and all are afraid that meeting Tigress will be the death of me.. But maybe you never had those problems? I have had over 200 mates.. one mateship lasted me 3 months.. you think that's fun?? You think its fun to see the girl you are dating to go for your best friend because you weren't as good in bed as he was, because he could fuck with a rubber and you couldn't, you wilted?? I don't think you would find that fun either.. So don't go selfrightous and protective on me.. I if any is probably more protective about tiggs than you ever will be.. I love her with my heart and soul.. and for ONCE I have found peace.. inside my heart. A peace I never had before.. I would never hurt her or hurt her future.... I love her to great for that... Current Mood: aggravated Current Music: Filmmusik - Gladiator (Comment on this)
Friday, August 9th, 2002
1:47 pm	Today is a worrysome day.. I made a decision that kind of scares me.. My beloved mate desires a threesome, I just dont know if I should let it come through.. I mean I have everything prepared and I want to give her pleasure and make her happy but not at the cost of my heart.. I just worry, I feel cold inside as a wind of loneliness begins to blow again.. Maybe it is a sign of things to come.. I dont know what to do.. I dont know if I should go through with this.. *sighs* Current Mood: worried Current Music: Billy Myers - Kiss The Rain (Comment on this)
Wednesday, July 31st, 2002
5:33 pm	Soon, soon ill be meeting my mate.. I am so excited over it.. :) (Comment on this)
Wednesday, July 17th, 2002
1:46 am	I really feel odd about this, but then again.. I Am A: Chaotic Evil Elf Mage Alignment: Chaotic Evil characters are the most 'evil' people out there. They are willing to do anything to get ahead, and will kill anyone who stands in their way. A chaotic evil person sees no value in order and governments, and believes to the utmost in the tenant that 'Might Makes Right'. Race: Elves are the eldest of all races, although they are generally a bit smaller than humans. They are generally well-cultured, artistic, easy-going, and because of their long lives, unconcerned with day-to-day activities that other races frequently concern themselves with. Elves are, effectively, immortal, although they can be killed. After a thousand years or so, they simply pass on to the next plane of existence. Primary Class: Mages harness the magical energies for their own use. Spells, spell books, and long hours in the library are their loves. While often not physically strong, their mental talents can make up for this. Secondary Class: Monks are strange and generally not understood by the world at large. They live apart from people, and follow strict codes that restrain their behavior and lifestyle. They have an exceptionally calm outlook on life, and generally do not resort to violence unless absolutely necessary. Even when they do, their code of conduct forbids the use of all weapons - except their hands. As such, monks are extremely skilled at hand-to-hand combat, and no other style. Deity: Velsharoon is the Neutral Evil god of necromancy, liches, and undeath. He is also known as the Vaunted, the Archmage of Necromancy, and the Lord of the Forgotten Crypt. His followers practice the necromantic arts, and raise the dead to do their bidding. His symbol is a crowned skull. Find out What D&D Character Are You?, courtesy ofNeppyMan (e-mail) Take the World of Darkness Quiz by David J Rust Current Mood: happy (Comment on this)
Thursday, July 11th, 2002
6:44 pm	I really love my mate, now she has said things that worries me. Words are easy to say, but I wish I could prove to her how I feel. To show her that I am sincere despite the malicious rumors and the fursons that has talked bad about me. To show her I would always be there for her no matter what. I wish I could show her my love in physical form, and then I don't mean by sex. It seems I cant.. but I hope still.. I also fear and wonder, "what if?" "Will she?" "Maybe today its over?" Christine, if you read this, I want you to understand I love you.. I mean it.. and I will prove it to you.. Your mate Current Mood: scared Current Music: Rolling Stones - Paint It Black (Comment on this)
4:12 am	My greatest love When I once thought I had lost all sense of direction in my life, I was hitting on each and everyone hoping that someone, maybe everyone would love me. I tried to be there for them all, and I also did some bad things and I hurt them. I cant undo the damage I did to them, but I have been given a new chance on life. When I met you Tiggress, my beloved Christine, something was different. With you I open myself up for you and reveal every side of myself that not even my old friends on the net except one knows about. I am afraid I will get hurt, but I want to take this risk with you my beloved one. I want to take that step and share my life with you, if not now then soon. My love, no matter where you are, I will always be here for you Christine. I will be your pillar of strength when times are rough, and there to talk to when things are bad. I love you Christine, more than anything else I love you. Words cant explain how I feel when I speak to you.. giddy, happy loved.. warm..all those things at once.. My mate, I can vow I will never deceive you, never leave you and never hurt you in any way I can prevent it. I will always be there for you Christine.. Always my love Current Mood: loved Current Music: Rednex - The Spirit Of The Hawk (Comment on this)
Wednesday, July 10th, 2002
8:58 pm	Mrrr.. the days are passing.. I am counting to see my mate soon... life is so wonderful ATM with my mate to talk to. Without her I would be empty. I would also like to apologize to Dofain mentioned earlier here, he was only partially guilty and his intentions was sincere. He did care for both me and my mate. Dofain, we have had a long talk. I was a real bitch towards you.. I want to say I am sorry. I hope you forgive me. My mate is just so sweet, my days are as rosy as the evenings here when I know that we will meet soon. My only fear is that something would come in between, but it wont. I am sure of that.. Tiggress, I LOVE you ;) I want to shout it to the entire world. Maybe you get to read a newspaper about a mad Swedish person climbing up on the top of the white house and HOWL out his love for you in national TV and in papers.. because I would like to do that :) if I could.. :) Current Music: E-Type (Campione 2000) (1).mpeg (Comment on this)
Monday, July 8th, 2002
8:20 pm	Welp, now it has happened again.. A rare visit from one of my oldest friend named Maria. She and I have known each other for 20+ years and I am happy that she thinks its ok that I truly have found a true mate. (Comment on this)
5:56 pm	A wonder A miracle has occured.. That miracle is called Tigress AKA Christine. I never thought I would be happy again, I was so worried I lost her. It has been shown it is not so :) I have met many girls all over, but no one has had the heart and care that she does. For once, I believe the old adage "True love finds you, not the opposite". I think it has found me.. I know I love her, and I know she loves me. In august we will finally meet and have fun, to share things we have mutual and learn from eachother where we dont share interests. I Wish I was there right now, every day without her is a sad day. Shes not here to snuggle me, for me to cuddle her and snug her and inhale her scent and just hold her tightly.. I love her.. You hear that world, I love her :) *giddy orca* (Comment on this)
Saturday, July 6th, 2002
4:55 am	Wheee, we are together again.. (Comment on this)
12:54 am	It seems my worries was wrong, or maybe they were right. I will prove my love to my girl.. to 100% I will show her I am worthy her and her love That I promise to you Tigress.. that I prove to you with all my heart and soul. Current Music: Rednex - The Spirit Of The Hawk (Comment on this)
12:09 am	I really wish there was some way I could show her how much I love her. I am here in sweden, stuck and unable to go to her.. Damn it.. Oh well. I suppose that this means I will be alone now forever. and I mean forever. There is NO way in hell I will have another relation with anyone.. not after this.. never again.. Current Music: Rammstein - Wann kommt die Flut (Comment on this)
12:07 am	It has been done, all thanks to dofain and the others. Again my dreams was crushed thanks to someone else. I suppose it is a sign I should stay the bloody hell away from relations. I dont think I will goto USA now, there is no meaning to anymore. even the job interview will feel empty and worthless thanks to this event. Thanks a lot dofain, if I ever meet you RL, I swear I will pay you back with extra much. Current Music: Rammstein - Heirate Mich (Comment on this)
Friday, July 5th, 2002
11:26 pm	On this date it seems like I have lost my cherished one. I suppose I made a mistake. Oh whale.. It just ends like this always. Looks like I never will have happiness. it was nice while it lasted.. I will never have that chance again to have such a sweet person close to me. *sighs* what good is it to not have someone to care about. This is SO unfair that a bastard like dofain can find happiness and not me. Well, atleast there are ways for me as well.. Cursed be dofain and his family now and forever. Current Music: Rhapsody - Legendary Tales (Comment on this)
10:00 pm	I so much long for meeting tigress. Yes that's her now it is out. I will be seeing tigress in august and I really fancy her a lot. Shes a real sweetheart with a heart of gold. I must say I deem myself honored to have been chosen by such a beautiful lady as herself. If there was words for pure beauty, she would be it. Her smile. her body and her entire attitude is more than attractive. :) I really long to hold her tightly... to snuggle her and nuzzle her. to spend just hours touching her and being in her company.. mrrrrr.... Current Mood: hyper Current Music: Sarah Brightman - Untitled (Comment on this)
9:38 pm	godess, how I wish I could be in California right now.. I so miss my girl there.. Oh well.. soon comes august and I will get to see the most beautiful and caring girl I ever spoken to. Whenever shes not around I feel lonely but she is around, I really feel happy. She has even inspired me to make a lot more poems. I will place them out on the net sometime when I get my lazy flukes to do so or she orders me to.. You know who you are my heart warmer.. WHEEE!! (Comment on this)
Thursday, July 4th, 2002
11:34 am	Egh, I had a wonderful dive yesterday but the damned upcurrent grabbed both me and my buddy. We both got a mild version of the bends and I really got tired. Gah, I don't like upcurrents. We also saw an old fishnet that we cut to pieces because we thought it was a danger. The sight was fairly ok and in general it was a really good dive. I am feeling a little uncomfortable in the so called furry fandom but there is a lot of good people in there and soon I will go to the United states to see my girl.. I really look forward to that. I think I need to sleep a little more, I still itch from the DCS.. GAH!!! Current Mood: tired Current Music: DJ Mystik - Moonlight Shining (Comment on this)
Wednesday, July 3rd, 2002
9:21 pm	Wheeee.. USA is really nutty now.. Airlinetravellers has to pay ALOT of cash to travel with them.. that is SO annoying indeed. I wish USA could become more europefriendly.. Oh well.. looks like my trip to USA is postponed some time now.. BLEH!! (Comment on this)